Where to begin? Well I guess I’ll have to dust off the cobwebs and wipe away the tears of frustration and go way back. I have had a problem with my weight since about age six.
Before that I was and active little bean pole that hated eating. (I know, I can’t believe it myself…I actually remember dreading having to eat! Why can’t that feeling return just every once in a while?) Then at age six I just blew up and became a chubbet from then on out. I began to menstruate at age 11. My periods were very irregular and heavy from the beginning.
Everyone said they are always irregular in the beginning and they will start to regulate with time. Well mine never did. In fact it seemed as time went on, they got further and further apart, lasting longer and longer, and heavier and heavier.
My other symptoms were darkened skin around my waist, the back of my neck, and on my thighs, obesity, depression, thinning hair on my head which migrated to my chin and neck! I come from a mother who was a fertility queen mother of six and have three sisters who had no problem conceiving or having children.
So where did I get this “problem”? Six years later, at age 17, my mother brought my to the gynecologist, I explained my cycles and symptoms and was diagnosed with PCOS. At that time there was very little information about PCOS. Maybe a paragraph here or there in a medical book. I felt like nobody cared and was dying for information.
Of course at age 17 I didn’t really understand the condition, and wasn’t really all that concerned about having babies. The doctor put my on the birth control pill (at age 17 I was like “whoo hoo!”) which I remained on for ten years until I was married.
After I got married I went off the pill and casually tried to get pregnant. No luck of course. At this time more and more info about PCOS was starting to emerge which just contributed to the depression! The bottom like I felt was “Just loose weight and you’ll get pregnant” Oh yeah, why didn’t I every try to loose weight? It has been the story of my life since age 6! I can’t count the number of times I went on an endless list of different diets.
And if that is so, why doesn’t everyone who is overweight have PCOS? The following year I was put on metf ormin which just gave me the runs and no baby. Now metformin does seem to work for many many people and I do believe that it does correct the underlying cause of the symptoms of PCOS. I did feel better on it, lost maybe 5 pounds, but I think when you eat like a pig like I was ,it counteracts the effects of the drug. Oh the wisdom I have gained in these past years……
At this point I had ballooned up to about 240 pounds and began researching gastic bypass surgery. I had read about the effects of the weight loss on fertility, as well as the effects on all the other health risks that come along with obesity and PCOS. After much ado, I underwent the surgery, which is the best thing that ever happened to me.
Now I am not advocating or pushing this on everyone. It does not come without risks and one should think heavily (no pun intended) about this and do what is right for each individual. After the surgery which was three years ago I lost 90 pounds, and it has changed me more mentally than physically. I am very conscience about my eating and exercise regularly, which for whatever reason I just couldn’t seem to do before, couldn’t stick with anything, and my cravings/wants would over power any efforts I would make. I am a changed person and very thankful for this in my life.
After the weight loss, my periods did become more regular, but were still irregular and unpredictable. Last summer I had a period in June and by the end of August I took a pregnancy test which was negative. After reading about the effects of weight loss on fertility I thought it might be a possibility. I took another one in early September which again was negative. The days marched on and no period and I just chalked it up to the PCOS.
Late in October I was awakened in the early morning hours to these horrible cramps, passed something that I never saw before and was shocked later in the doctor’s office to find out that I has miscarried! At first it was bitter sweet because I was thinking in my head “I got pregnant! It is possible!” But the sadness set in shorty there after. But hope remained!
I have since divorced ( A story for anther blog somewhere on another site!) And am in a commited wonderful relationship. Low and behold, I have found out this weekend that I am pregnant again. I am keeping my fingers crossed, taking care of myself and my body very diligently on a daily basis. For me, I think it wasn’t only the weight loss that helped, but the change in my habits.
Three years after surgery it is VERY easy to return to old habits, overeat, not stay active and gain weight again. Surgery is not an end all be all, it is simply a tool that helped me. I wish everyone here nothing but good luck, prosperous health and healthy babies (if that is the goal) Thank you for taking the time to read my ramblings and I hope you were able to get something positive out of it! Bright Blessing!
Want to connect with me? My name is missymoniz on the SoulCysters Message Board.