Scared and Lost

Im 25 Y/o but i was diagnosed with pcos at 16. in the early years i didint take my condition too seriously, being a young teen, shrugging it off. now that im older, engaged, wanting to start a family, i’ve learned from a fertility Dr. that its not as simple as the average person thinks.

I can’t help but feel completely lost, frustrated, helpless, and angry at the realization that so many problems come along with this problem, and not only do you have to deal with pain, embarrasment, and depression with pcos, but on top of all that being slapped with the harsh reality that i may never conceive, after dreaming of having kids for most of my life.

its devastating. my fiance and i have been trying for almost a year now, and since being off B.C. i havent had a single period. even at my worst before B.C. i would at least have a period every 3-4 months. now nothing.

has anyone else felt this way? like getting of birth control has completly screwed your hormones and made things worse?

i find myself crying sometimes late at night when i think of having a family lately, or seeing any pregnant lady gives be a sense of hopelessness, anger, and almost jealousy… because they will never know how lucky they are.

anyone else fear infertility and fetal complications?

am i alone in these fears?