Hello everyone. I wanted to tell my story in hopes that it will lighten someone load and let you know that there is hope.

My journey started when I was 17. At that age I still had never gotten a period. I thought that was cool since I saw how it made my friends feel. I went for a pap smear and exam and was dx with PCOS. I had never heard of that before. When my doctor explained it to my mother and I he told us that the chances of me ever being a mother was slim to none.

At that time I was like oh well. Being 17 I felt that I had my entire life to live and what did this man know anyway. At that time he started me on birth control. The next month I had a period. It was so very very painful. Three more months went by and no more periods. That the way they went. One month I would have one. Then I would not for 6 months. Then I would have a period for 30 days. Yes, I would bleed for 30 freaking days. But, the severity and the magnitude of PCOS had not hit me yet.

When I was 19 hair begin popping up all over my face. I was like geez what is this. I still was not worried because all the women in my family have a few whiskers. But, as time went on I saw that I could grow a full beard. It was the most heart breaking thing I thought I would have to face…

But, it was not… I went back to the doctor and was told oh well basically there is nothing we can do. You can shave or use shaving cream. I pushed because I did not want to have to shave. Damn it I am a woman and women do not shave.

So I researched and found out about electrolis. I went to have it done. Started with my upper lip. That really hurt. The next day my face was swollen and puffy. I went back to the doctor and found out I had Keloid skin (scar so eaisly) so electrolis was not an option anymore. So relectulently I started to shave and use cream. Twice a week to keep my face as smooth as possible.

Still no doctor ever attemted to help me with PCOS. When I was 24 I found a man that understood my condition — that I could not help the hair growth on my face– we fell in love and were married when I was 25. He had a son from a previous relationship so we were not in a hurry to have kids. I told him that I may never be able to have kids, but I think he did not really beleive that.

After being married for 4 years he decided he wanted kids. We tried the method were you track your cycle to see when to try. We did this for 1 year. Nothing. We went to a fertility doctor that immediately started me on clomid. I did that for 6 months. NOTHING. The doctor then started me on some kind of injections. Then they did an IUD. Still We did that for 6 more months. NOTHING. We could not afford to keep trying. As many of you know insurance did not cover the treatments. We said enough is enough and gave up.

At my 30th birthday my momma and mother in law cornered me and wanted to know where Tracy and I even trying to have babies. I was so hurt. I said no, because I only had periods twice a month since I had stopped birth control. My momma is a nurse so she handed me all kinds of information on PCOS. It took me another 6 months to read it.

When I read it I was shocked at what I had been neglecting. I was determined to find a doctor. I went to 8 OBGYNs before I met one that knew anything about PCOS. Dr. Brown did blood test and found my hormones where all screwed up. He explained that me being large had something to do with my PCOS. He did not know if me being large caused my PCOS or my PCOS caused me to be large. To me that was the least of my worries.

He started me on metformin and a low carb diet. This was in October of 2005. By Feb of 2006 I had lost 80lbs. I stopped taking everything because I thought that since I had lost weight I was now fine. NOT TRUE. Soon as I stopped the weight came back so quick. I went back to see the doctor in September 2006. He started me back on Met, but I did not want any fertility meds because my husband and I felt I was getting too old to keep trying I was 30.

I started back loosing weight. I was getting hot… My doctor moved. So I had to find another doctor who informed me why I never got pregnant. I was not ovulating. Huh! My egg was not maturing. She said the clomid and the injections helped that. And she felt I could get pregnant. She started me back on clomid. After the first cycle I was pregnant. At 16 weeks I misscarried. Dec. 2006. It was devistating, because I misscarried in the toliet.

I stopped the clomid on my own But, I was still having a period like clock work. I continued the met. A co-worked who was pregnant while I was told me about a website she went to. It was to track when you were ovulating. She told me and another co-worker. I did not go to it for a few months.

I guess my other co-worker went as soon as she was told. Because she was due in Feb. 2008. I went to the website and tracked my cycle for 2 months. We tried to catch the rabbit on the 3rd month. In July I got sick at work. Went to the doctor who told me my blood sugar had dropped to low. I went home and took a pregnancy test. I took the test and walked away to cook.

I let it sit on the sink. My husband went to the bathroom. He came out screaming. I was like what the heck is wrong .. I ran in the bathroom and he was holding the test. I was like what. He said look. It said pregnant. I said man that has to be wrong. Go get some more test. He brought back 10 test. Over the next two days we tested all 10 and they were all positive. I went to the doctor and they asked me when did I miss my period I said I had not. she said it was too soon to know but gave me the test anyway.

She came back and said you are pregnant. I was like I need a second opinion. Another nurse came and gave me another test and the same results. They asked me again when was my last period. I was like 19 days ago. I heard them laughing. I asked what was the problem. One of them said I bet you are having multiples. I said why she said because you have enough hormones to get a positive test before you missed a period. They set me an appointment for 7 weeks away.

I was so scard. Remember I misscarried once before. I went for my appointment and I was pregnant and I was pregnant with multiples with no treatments. I was due on April 24, 2008. WOW.

My pregnancy was so very hard. At 17 weeks I found out I had an incompetent cervix and was put on bedrest. At 18 weeks I went into labor. I was told my babies would not survive. I was like here we go again. I was in the hospital for 10 weeks. The doctors told me if I make it to 28 weeks the babies would have a chance. I stayed in the hospital upside down, to keep the babies in. I went into labor three times and it was stopped each time. I had great doctors.

I hit 28 weeks on Friday, Feb 1, 2008. The doctors finally let me go home. But, I had to go back to the hospital daily to be checked. On Sat my husband took me back to the hospital to be checked and everything was fine so we left the hospital at 2pm we went to eat fish. All of a sudden I started to have contractions. They were coming 2 min apart. My husband took me back to the hospital emergency room. They checked me and I was in active labor. I was 5 cm dialated.

They called me doctor and checked me again in 30 min and I was 7cm. It was happening that day and fast. They took me in for an emergency c section, because my babies were going to extremely premature. My son came at 4:05pm on 2/2/08 weighing 2lbs 3oz. My daughter came at 4:07pm weighing1lb 5.9oz. They are now 8 months old and are doing great.

There is hope. Don’t give up. When the road seems tough as it will remember God has a plan. Keep the faith. If I had given up (as I wanted to so badly). I would have missed my wonderful blessings… Marcus and Morgan.

I am now trying to find a new doctor to work on the hair growth on my face. I will let all of you know how that turns out. But, if I have learned one thing on this journey … That is not to give up hope, because I beleive that we should PUSH (PRAY UNTIL SOMETHING HAPPENS)

Want to connect with me? My name is finallyamomoftwins on the SoulCysters Message Board.